Get free answers from our therapists
I have a feeling my son is getting cyber bullied. How do I support him?
If you think your child is being bullied/cyberbullied there are several things you can do to support them:
- Provide them will all the love and support – reassure them that this is not their fault and that talking/reporting the incident was the right thing to do.
- Joining activities outside of school settings to improve self-confidence, and self-esteem, form friendships out of school.
- Notify the school – Inform teachers, principals or school nurses about what your child is experiencing and they will most likely have behavioural policies regarding such situations. Thus, they will enforce plans to avoid any future instances of making your child comfortable again.
- Make sure you tell your child not to respond to situations of bullying (especially cyberbullying) – could potentially make the situation worse.
- Keep track of all bullying activity – to later show evidence to the bully’s parents, school, and police if needed in serious situations.
- Seek professional help – talking to a therapist may help your child open up about their feelings.
I am due to start CBT and I would like some more information on it. Is it going ...
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is a form of talking therapy that is used as a first choice of treatment for a wide variety of mental health problems.
Cognitive behavioural therapy combines both cognitive therapy (things you think) and behavioural therapy (things you do) together to help identify better adaptive ways of interpreting and processing information.
CBT is very effective as a first choice, for various disorders as recommended by The National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE). CBT is a very effective treatment for :
- Anxiety Disorders
- Bipolar disorder
- Panic disorder
- Borderline Personality disorder
- Eating disorders – anorexia and bulimia
- Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
- Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)
- Sleep problems
- Drug or alcohol problems
- Anger problems
- Low self-esteem
- Physical health issues, like fatigue and pain
What are some charities I can turn towards for help for ASD?
For any more support or guidance, here are a few charities and websites which offer their services
- National autistic society – Autism.org.uk
- Autism alliance – autism-alliance.org.uk which has a network of 17 autism charities
- Local groups can be found using the autism services director or NHS service finder
- Social media platforms such as Twitter and Facebook
- Forums on autism.org.uk and Autism Support on healthunlocked.com
- School support services or manager/HR in the workplace
You can also get support here at Mindsum through our network of mental health professionals. Visit mindsum.app .
How do I report abuse?
If you are a young person the best thing to do is try and speak to a trusted adult e.g. a teacher. As an adult, if you notice any signs of abuse with a child and are worried that they are at risk, you should first try and build a positive and trusting relationship to see if they eventually feel comfortable in having a conversation with you and admitting that something wrong is going on.
You should report any abuse to the social care team at the child’s council even if it is just a suspicion and this can be done anonymously. If they are at immediate risk call 999 if it is not an emergency you can report online at https://www.police.uk/pu/contact-the-police/report-a-crime-incident/. You can also contact NSPCC counsellors at 0808 800 5000 from Mon-Fri 8am-10pm and on Sat- Sun 9am-6pm or email them at firstname.lastname@example.org.
If you are a child or young person you can call ChildLine at 0800 1111 for free and it will not show on any of your phone bills
My partner is diagnosed with BPD, how can I support them?
Thank you for your question.
You are already taking a huge step in finding out how you can support your partner with BPD. There are many ways to make your partner feel at ease in your relationship.
- Be patient: Acknowledging that your partner is struggling to handle their emotions. If they are having an angry outburst, stepping back and being patient is the best response.
- Don't judge: Providing a non-judgemental and secure environment for your partner can help build trust and allow your partner to know that you are there to support them.
- Remind them of their positive traits: Reminding your partner of their positive traits and positive memories can get reassure them and calm them down.
- Learn their triggers: Finding out what makes your partner have their negative thoughts and emotions can help you avoid and prevent them.
- Learn more about BPD: Educate yourself on BPD. Learn more about the stigmas, misconceptions and struggles to make your partner feel heard.
For more information on how to support someone with BPD, you can read about it on Mindsum.
How can I support my child better with challenging behaviour?
Thank you for reaching out to us.
It is important to support your child through this time of development. You can start this by encouraging positive and healthy communication.
Participating in parenting skills training can help you teach behaviour management strategies that improve your child's relationships with their peers and also their academic performance.
It is also good to consider counselling for your child to learn skills like managing their anger or impulse control.
Lastly, it is beneficial to try family therapy where family interactions are improved.
I am worried about my drinking habits. When is substance abuse a concern?
Substance abuse becomes a concern when a person develops a tolerance to the drug over time, requiring larger doses to achieve the same effect. Eventually, dependence can occur, where the drug is needed to function normally and withdrawal symptoms can be severe when trying to stop use.
If you are concerned about your drinking patterns, speak to your GP for support. Alternatively, you can reach out for a free initial consultation with a trusted mental health professional.
How can I support my child with Complex PTSD?
To support your child with Complex PTSD, you can try the following activities:
- Normalising emotions: Inform the child that experiencing strong emotions after a traumatic event is common and can alleviate their guilt. Encourage a supportive and safe environment to foster trust.
- Distraction: Engage the child in activities that divert their attention from the traumatic event and reduce stress such as playing games, cooking, signing, drawing, and sports.
- Quick response: Create a safe haven for the child during panic attacks or flashbacks, practice breathing exercises and mindfulness, and address and eliminate triggers.
- Grounding techniques: Implement techniques to help the child calm down such as having them identify 5 things they see, 4 things they hear, 3 things they smell, 2 things they touch and 1 thing they taste.
I have been advised to undergo DBT. How effective is it?
Who Can Diagnose Children's Mental Health?
If parents are concerned about their child's mental health, they can seek help from professionals such as their GP, school counselor, social services, or a children's center.
The GP can refer the child to specialized mental health services like CAMHS or CYPMHS, which focus specifically on children's mental health. CAMHS can provide a range of treatments, including therapy, medication, and hospitalization, depending on the child's needs.
Contacting CAMHS can be done through the GP referral or by contacting them directly through their website or phone number. The diagnostic process begins once the child is referred to CAMHS, which is a free service provided by the NHS.
Hello, I have been facing a lot of stress recently because of work. Any tips to ...
I am sorry to hear that. Stress is something we all experience throughout our life however it can sometimes get too much and affect our everyday lifestyle. I will share with you some tips on how to reduce your stress.
When work becomes overwhelming and you feel like you are having too much stress, it is important to have a support circle in which you can speak about your stress and work worries. If you find yourself having physical symptoms as a result of stress such as increased heart rate or difficulty breathing, mindfulness and meditation is a quick response to feel better. You can find various Mindfulness exercises through this link.
On the other hand if you find yourself having difficulty breathing or being overwhelmed about a situation, you can always try a quick breathing exercise.
Whenever, I represent myself in front of lots of people, I'm totally black out. ...
Thank you for your question.
It sounds like you are having a social anxiety issue and I want to start off by saying that this is something that a lot of people experience. There are lots of different ways that you can cope. Firstly you can start off by understanding this trigger better by visiting this link.
You can then start to explore strategies to change your negative thinking by visiting this link. It can be very easy to avoid social situations of groups of people in order to reduce this feeling however avoidance can result in feeling worse. You can read more about this here.
Lastly, working on your self esteem will allow you to be more confident when presenting yourself to people and reduce your negative feelings and the feeling of blacking out. This is a useful resources for your self-esteem.
I am always scared when I deliver my work to my boss, How to deal with this?
Thank you Stephen for your question.
Performance anxiety is very common in the workplace and there are ways that you can identify it and cope with it. Firstly, you can prepare yourself for any questions or areas in your work delivery that may be weak in which your boss may question allowing you to prepare yourself for any negative comments and decrease your worry. At times when you cannot prepare yourself, it will help to know your triggers and what scares you and how to cope with these triggers. You can read more about triggers through this link.
Anxiety is a natural response that everyone feels. Understanding the mechanism and how to use anxiety positively is a good way to cope as you can turn something that you are currently viewing as negative to something positive which in turn will help you in your workplace! To read more about this mechanism you can visit this link.
Learning to control and reduce your worry and fear will allow you to distress prior to delivering your work and help you reduce your anxiety. This will help control and reduce the negative feeling so that your interactions with your boss will be more positive and constructive. You can visit this link.
Increasing your self esteem will help with feeling more self-confident in your work. You can keeping a journal of positive things you have done through out the day. Alternatively, if you find that something doesn't go well through out your workday, you can practice self-compassion to reduce future negative self thoughts.
How to deal with anxiety or stress during talking with other person.
I am very sorry to hear that you feel this way when talking to someone else.
One thing that can help you with this is to use the Feelings Wheel which can help you identify your anxiety and stress to more specific feelings. This can help you cope and manage them. Another thing you can try is some Mindfulness.
Mindsum offers information regarding anxiety which can help in understanding what anxiety is and using it to its potential in a more poisitive way. You can find information on Anxiety and how to help yourself with Anxiety.
Lastly, if you feel like your interactions with people cause you to have a panic attack, you can read more about it on Mindsum.
I have been going through serious heartbreak, I'm not able to deal with it. What...
Thank you for submitting this question.
I am sorry to hear about your break up. It's always very difficult to navigate after a relationship ends. There is no right or wrong way to deal with a break up. You need to feel all the emotions you are going through and not supress them. I can direct you to a couple of resources that can support you and guide you during this difficult time.
This article on Tiny Buddha sets out nicely some things you may wan to try out and also helps you view things from an unbiased emotional point of view. Finally, something that a lot of people struggle with after a break up is finding back themselves and the person they where before the relationship. It is true that relationships may change your personality and the person you are so it is very important to find your true self after a break up. You can read more about that through here.
My mother has OCD , How can I help her?
Thank you for your inquiry.
I want to firstly reassure you that there are many different types of ways to support someone who has OCD. To start off, it is very important to make your mother feel supported and make sure she does not feel isolated. You can do this by being understanding of what they are going through and what they might feel, being non-judgemental and patient. Talking openly about OCD can help your mother as it removes the embarassment and ultimately the stigma around mental health and OCD.
Encouraging activities and living life as normal as possible instead of accommodating the fear will be helpful as avoidance can result the person isolating themselves. Helping your mother with her self esteem can also be helpful. This is done by pointing out things that she is good at. It is easy to automatically focus on things that OCD can make difficult and that she struggles with so pointing out their strengths in areas they do well can have a positive result.
Lastly, it is important to remember to take care of yourself when supporting someone else as you cannot pour from an empty cup.
You can also visit our page to read more about helping someone with OCD.
I have anxiety issue that not letting me live the normal life. There is always c...
Thank you for asking this question, I understand it can be very overwhelming to feel constant fear.
Firstly, you can try talking to friends, family or close people to get that first support. It always helps to talk about what you feel fearful of and have the reassurance that there is someone there to support you during a rough time. Secondly, with anxiety it is always useful to get psychological therapies. Psychological therapies consist of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Psychotherapy etc.
Mindsum has a group of therapist who specialise in anxiety and you can book a free initial consultation with them if you wish to go through the private practice. You can read more about this on our website. If you wish to use the NHS for help, you can self refer yourself to the NHS talking therapies. You can find more information from your GP or through this link. If anxiety gets to the point of you not being able to function in everyday life, then it is important to get support and help. Always remember that anxiety is treatable and you can get better.
My depression leading to drink more alcohol ,what to do ?
Hi, I'm sorry to hear you're going through a difficult time.
It sounds like you’re self-medicating your depression with alcohol. Speaking to your GP about the experiences, thoughts and feelings you’re experiencing may help them understand and support you though therapy and medication to help you move forward. NHS prescriptions are cheaper and can be less harmful to your body than drinking alcohol.
Another route could be to contact your local Alcoholics Anonymous group, even if you don’t drink every day they can offer support.
How do I deal with someone telling me what to do?
Thank you for taking the time to ask this question.
It is expected that other people will ask you to do things to support them. However, I understand how frustrating it can be when you feel like others are asking too much. Have a think about what your physical, mental and emotional boundaries, and learn what boundaries are acceptable to you. This will help you see what boundaries are being crossed when you’re asked to do things for others.
You could try using the following tool to communicate your feelings when being asked to do things that don’t align with your boundaries. DEARMAN: The Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) can also help you to communicate about other related annoyances such as tone of voice and the way in which you’re asked to do things for others.
Any tips on how to move from anger and frustration with anxiety to a place of co...
Thank you for your question.
Many people find this change in mindset difficult however once you begin being able to be compassionate towards yourself, it gets easier to accept anxiety and move forward.
Firstly it’s important to remind yourself that anxiety is not a choice. It’s a tool your brain uses to protect you from what it perceives as real danger. Writing a life timeline of significant positive and negative events throughout your life can help you understand what’s led you to develop anxiety.
Another way of thinking about having anxiety is questioning the benefits such as allowing you to understand and be compassionate to others that experience anxiety. Some people find positive mantras helpful. You could try saying to yourself phrases such as “I am strong” or “I am determined”.
Journaling is a useful tool to help you identify and understand triggers which may help you become more accepting of general feelings of anxiety.